Today I drove over 300 miles and stapled the better part of 3000 staples. I am tired to my marrow--I shot right on past tired to my bones. Tomorrow morning I need to be in the studio by 8:00 to get the rollup-slabs loaded into the pick-up kiln so we can do two roll-up pieces for the Buyer's Market tomorrow afternoon. V is coming to work on the studio books, Dee is coming to get some glass and to plot and plan, I need to get with Mike on website updates--I am getting embarrassingly behind on both websites, and I have two orders to fire. Wow do I suddenly feel even more tired.
I have not been my usual motivated, happy, perky self for the past couple of weeks. Dallas really took it out of me, and nothing seems able to put it back in. Everyone keeps asking if I'm ok, and initially I'm mildly surprised at the question, but then I realize that I'm being asked because my glass is clearly half-full. Oh I'm not depressed or anything, I just have no positive expectations. Todd asked me on the way back from Greenville today who I would have dinner with if I could have dinner with anyone living or dead. I thought about it for a couple of minutes and replied "No one." When asked why not, I said that the dinner would never be able to live up to my expectations for it so it was better to leave it as a dream and not be disappointed by the reality. Todd looked at me as if I had lost my mind and I realized that the attitude exemplified by that answer is pretty much a constant state for me right now...
But, but, but the Buyer's Market is in two weeks! I need to be at the top of my game for it! The detox at Kashi Yoga starts this Friday (Thursday night) and even though I gave up alcohol and caffeine almost a week ago in anticipation of it, I am afraid I'm too blah to do it. Maybe a quiet normal week next week while Dave is in Austin would be more effective at improving my state than ghee for breakfast and a hefty dose of cod liver oil at the end of the week.
Now a little House on the Apple tv and an earlyish night.